It’s true that 1999 saw the release of many great movies, but for every good movie, it seems as though there has to be a bad one. Call it the universe evening things out, if you want, or tie it to Thanos’ musings on how all things should be perfectly balanced. Great movies reveal themselves as truly great by being compared to movies that fail, and vice-versa. It’s the way things have always been.
The following titles demonstrate that 1999 was home to a good number of films that missed the mark, resulting in movies that were ultimately quite bad. They range from flawed but watchable to unmitigated disasters, and are ranked below in descending order; in other words, from bad to worst.
10 ‘Godzilla 2000: Millennium’
There are plenty of wild Godzilla movies out there, ensuring that the series is an overall entertaining and wonderfully unpredictable one. And following the disastrous American version of Godzilla in 1998, the next movie out of Japan – where the series originated – should’ve been a slam-dunk.
Because it was released one year after what might be the worst Godzilla movie, Godzilla 2000: Millennium is still a somewhat passable movie in comparison to what came out of the American film industry. But it’s still not a great movie, and even if fans will get something out of it, it’s probably not worth seeking out for those who aren’t already praying at the church of Godzilla.
9 ‘Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo’
Rob Schneider isn’t exactly the most beloved comedic actor out there, but for a time in the late 1990s and early 2000s, he was surprisingly popular. Though he was more often relegated to supporting roles, he occasionally played the lead in various comedies, with 1999’s Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo being one of the most well-known of these movies.
In it, he plays a man who accidentally becomes a gigolo, and finds his life becoming even more chaotic when he falls for one of his clients. It serves as a broadly comedic take on the sort of story told in American Gigolo (1980), and was somehow successful enough to get a sequel in 2004. Modern-day viewers are probably best off avoiding it, though, if they’re even aware of its existence in the first place.
8 ‘The Haunting’
Robert Wise was a great American director who made a variety of noteworthy films throughout his long and varied career, with one of them being The Haunting. It was a definitive movie for the horror genre, following a group of people – led by a paranormal investigator – as they go through a house that might be haunted.
It was the kind of movie that everyone seemed to like, and as far as 1960s horror movies go, it had aged very well, making the existence of its 1999 remake a baffling one. It largely fails as a scary movie, and at best will only appeal to those who like their horror to be more campy than actually frightening. Sure, Owen Wilson’s in it, but it’s not nearly impressive enough in any regard to have any viewers saying “wow.”
7 ‘Wild Wild West’
It’s certainly possible to make a Western that also works as a comedy, but Wild Wild West didn’t manage to crack the code. This infamous blockbuster also serves as a buddy action movie with science-fiction elements, with its ambitious blend of genres and impressive cast making it sound potentially interesting on paper.
However, it’s the execution that ends up leaving a great deal to be desired. Wild Wild West simply isn’t funny, and unfortunately, it tries to be funny for most of its runtime. When something’s trying to be serious and fails, it can become funny; an example of the “so-bad-it’s-good” phenomenon. However, when a comedic movie fails, it’s usually just bad and difficult to sit through. Case in point: Wild Wild West.
6 ‘Candyman: Day of the Dead’
1992 saw the release of Candyman, which has endured to this day as one of the better horror movies of the decade. It got a less well-received (though not awful) sequel in 1995, but the release of the third movie in 1999 – Candyman: Day of the Dead – effectively stopped the series dead in its tracks, and it took until 2021 for another Candyman movie to see the light of day.
It wasn’t a theatrical release like the others, making it feel cheaper in comparison, and things aren’t helped much by its implausible plot and shaky acting. Only those who are particularly dedicated to the horror genre should ever think about seeking this out, and even then, such people should still probably approach Candyman: Day of the Dead with caution.
5 ‘Soccer Dog: The Movie’
A movie like Soccer Dog: The Movie is dead on arrival, really. Just what chance does it have? If it was called Soccer Dog, that would be silly enough, even without it being a transparent attempt to cash in on the success of Air Bud, which is about a dog that plays basketball.
But then it tags “The Movie” onto the title, and that just makes it sound even more ridiculous. It’s like it has to insist that it’s legitimate, as if people wouldn’t quite believe a movie called Soccer Dog was actually – well, a movie. Also, it got a sequel in 2004 called Soccer Dog: European Cup. The film industry can be an inexplicable and unwieldy creature, sometimes.
A bizarre kaiju movie with a very strange monster at its center, Yonggary is very bad, but also quite entertaining when watched with the right mindset. It was an attempt to reboot a 1967 movie called Yongary, Monster from the Deep, though that one at least benefits from feeling like an old-school monster movie, and therefore without bad CGI.
Make no mistake: when it comes to 1999’s Yonggary, the CGI is awful even by the standards of the late 1990s. It renders Yonggary impossible to take even the slightest bit seriously, which means that laughing at this film about another giant monster attacking another city is the only way to truly get through it. At least it manages to be pretty funny unintentionally, all the while its attempts to be intentionally funny (mainly through one-liners) fail spectacularly.
3 ‘Children of the Corn 666: Isaac’s Return’
Those who aren’t particularly huge horror fans might be shocked to learn that there are a total of 11 movies in the Children of the Corn series. Its first film came out in 1984, and the most recent release was in 2020, and of those, none are particularly well-regarded, or even seen as minor classics within the horror genre. Say what you want about a repetitive horror series like Friday the 13th, but at least it birthed at least a couple of decent movies.
Children of the Corn 666: Isaac’s Return is the sixth movie in the series, which probably explains why they worked “666” into the title. It was all for nothing, though, because this is a series that also features the word “Corn” in all its movie’s titles. How are you supposed to take any of it seriously? Some people seem to find something in these films, though, given there are 11 of them and all. The mysteries of life…
2 ‘Baby Geniuses’
Speaking of bizarrely long film franchises, there are five Baby Geniuses movies. Each one follows a group of super-intelligent infants, and though 2004’s Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2 (these titles are all irredeemably bad, for real) is considered the worst, the 1999 original, Baby Geniuses, doesn’t exactly have many fans either.
Thankfully, its title makes it pretty easy to avoid for anyone over the age of say five, given these are the sorts of movies that’ll probably only entertain viewers so young they won’t even have genuine memories of watching them later in life. But for whatever reason, Baby Geniuses is now a franchise. There are more Baby Geniuses movies than Mad Max movies. Let that sink in!
1 ‘The Legend of the Titanic’
Not to be mixed up with the acclaimed romance/disaster film from 1997, The Legend of the Titanic is instead a bizarre attempt to profit off the Titanic film that made James Cameron the king of the (movie) world. This is an animated kid’s film about the most infamous maritime disaster of all time. Those behind this film really go there.
Granted, it’s certainly not historically accurate, given it involves talking animals, a shape-shifting octopus, and (seemingly) no actual casualties. It’s bad and bizarre in a way that’s kind of compelling, and was followed up by a 2004 sequel called In Search of the Titanic (what’s with all these 1999 movies getting 2004 sequels?) that’s somehow even wilder.
NEXT: Strange Titanic Films That Aren’t James Cameron’s ‘Titanic’